For as long as I can remember, I carried a heaviness I couldn’t name. Growing up, I thought what I experienced was “normal.” The lies and manipulation of a certain person, the constant feeling that my emotions didn’t matter, it was all I knew. I didn’t realize it then, but those were the early signs of emotional abuse that shaped how I would see myself and how I would later love others.
I grew up in the northern part of the Philippines, surrounded by chaos within my mother’s family and relatives. I remember telling myself, “I will never be like them.” I became the quiet one, the listener, the peacemaker, the one who didn’t want to cause trouble. When I moved to another city to study, I thought I had escaped. But what I didn’t know was that I carried all the pain, fear, and silence with me.
As adults, many of us who grew up in emotionally neglectful or abusive homes don’t realize that we attract what feels familiar, not what’s healthy. When love feels like chaos, attention feels like manipulation, and silence feels like safety, we unconsciously recreate the emotional patterns we grew up with. That’s how people like me, with unhealed wounds, often attract narcissists.
When I met him, I thought I had finally found someone who understood me. He listened, he cared, and he made me feel seen, something I had longed for since childhood. But slowly, the mask slipped. The gaslighting began. The love I thought I had found turned into confusion, self-doubt, and pain. I felt like I was losing myself but the truth was, I was being forced to face the parts of me that had never healed.
It took time and deep inner work to realize this: narcissists are drawn to empathy, vulnerability, and people who have learned to prioritize others over themselves. They sense the cracks created by childhood wounds and they use them to their advantage. But healing those wounds changes everything. When you learn to love yourself, set boundaries, and recognize your worth, you stop being an easy target for manipulation.
This isn’t just about pain, it’s about awakening. My experience with narcissistic abuse became the mirror that reflected my unhealed inner child back to me. It forced me to confront my past, to break the cycle, and to finally choose myself.
If you’re reading this and any of it feels familiar, please know this: you are not broken, and you are not to blame. Your past might explain why you accepted certain behaviors, but it does not define your future. Healing is possible, and once you begin that journey, you’ll attract not chaos but peace, respect, and genuine love.
Because once you heal, you no longer chase love that hurts. You become the love you were always searching for. 💫
your awareness gives you the power to transform your life and break any cycle.
But here’s the truly empowering truth:
Awareness is freedom
Understanding how your past shapes your present isn’t a weakness, it’s your superpower. Awareness opens the door to making choices that honor your heart and your growth.
Healing lights the way
Every step you take to heal through self-reflection, creativity, or therapy strengthens your sense of worth. This inner glow naturally attracts people who lift you higher and respect your boundaries.
Your scars are your strength
The challenges you’ve faced have made you compassionate, resilient, and deeply intuitive. These gifts allow you to form authentic connections and inspire others on their own journeys.
You are the author of your story
Every relationship and experience is a choice. By embracing self-love and emotional awareness, you invite partnerships and connections that honor, support, and celebrate the real you.
✨ Shine bright reminder: Your past doesn’t limit you, it equips you. Every step toward healing protects your heart, amplifies your power, and attracts the love, respect, and joy you are truly meant to experience.
Create a Life you Love 